Entries in War on Black Women (10)


Your Election Opening Thread

I already voted during early voting, which I never have done for presidential elections. I actually like going to the polls on election day. I think I was so tired of hearing about the election, I decided to just get it over with. In any event, I have never had to stand in a line as long to vote for anything. 

I want to thank CNN for bleeping out the word b*%%& at this election rally performance by Jay-Z, unfortunately they left in H(*%. Yep. Yep. Yep. 

Happy Black Woman has an interesting post called Be the President of Your Own Life

I quit the internet for about 96 hours. 



There is an US. There is a THEM: Solidarity is NOT an Excuse to be Stupid

Black women and girls, if you don’t remember anything that I have blogged in 5 plus years, remember this: There is an US. There is a THEM. And that’s OKAY.

There are some people who have no problem with certain members of the Black community making high profile statements are are direct attacks on the health, safety, and wellbeing of Black girls, but the moment Black folks with common sense rise up to condemn these predators and shut ‘em down - spectators who like to sit on the sidelines and do absolutely nothing start howling. They start whining about “civility.”

What is civil about girls being sexually assaulted? What is civil about violence against Black women and girls. What is civil about the practice of FAR TOO MANY Black men and boys getting one girl in an isolated location and “running a train” ( a euphemism for GANG RAPE)? Where is the civility in telling Black girls that they should not be entitled to  the protection of the laws against sexual exploitation of children because the man or boy exploiting them is more valuable than they are?  

Folks claim that they don’t like to see Black people fight in public.  They demand Black Unity. Unity with what?

Somewhere along the way, Black Unity got corrupted and came to mean Black folks working together so a tiny group of Black folk in the northeast could accumulate wealth, power and influence. We marched so that they could vacation on Martha’s Vineyard and  hang out in the Hamptons. We must be unified in their efforts to wear red bottom shoes, lease  Bentleys, and get an upside down mortgage on a 10 - bedroom  particle board house with a bowling alley in the basement. Black Unity now means that when massive White-run record labels hand out record deals, they UNIFORMLY hand them out to “artists” who want to uniformly rhyme about bullets, booty, and bling. Black Unity means that VH1 uniformly displays the most violent, mentally ill, drug addled Black women they can find and tells the world that that mess is who we are uniformly. 

Black Unity now means that going to jail is a “rite of passage.” Black Unity now means that (yeah I’mma go there) we have uniformly accepted the fact that Black fathers are “optional” - like  AppleCare, or cruise control, or marble counter tops. We have uniformly agreed that Black boys are precious and scarce and we should preserve every one from the clutches of the criminal justice system- even if that means literally sacrificing the lives of the apparently “over abundant” and ubiquitous Black girl.

In the name of this corrupted Black Unity, these cowards hiding behind the cloaks of compromise and civility have demanded that we become silent so the status quo may continue to go unchallenged.  

If you don’t remember anything else I’ve written in 5 plus years, remember this: There is an US. There is a THEM. And that’s Okay. 

Don’t ever be unified with someone who wants to toss you over the side of a cliff. Your life is valuable. Your destiny was not to act as a mule or a footstool for a bunch of Black folks who don’t care about you. You have a God-given right to engage in your own self defense and anyone telling you to sacrifice yourself for their own comfort and profit is your enemy. ENEMY ENEMY ENEMY - repeat that until it rolls off your tongue.  ENEMY! They are your enemy.  They may be Black. They may be women. But if they come for you and yours, they are your enemy. 

If the choice is between your own survival and their comfort and profit - Choose YOU!  Choose YOU! Choose YOU! You can still be unified with other Black people without having to serve as a human sacrifice on the alter of other Black folk’s comfort and profit.

What we do here at What About Our Daughters IS BLACK UNITY! It’s the best kind of Black Unity! It’s a Black Unity based on shared values and not blind loyalty. It is a Black Unity based on selflessness and not selfishness. It is a Black Unity that is based on genuine concern of for the wellbeing of ALL versus the selfish ambition of SOME. 

I will not concede that WE are somehow being disloyal or disagreeable when we call other Black people what they are: ENEMIES of Black Women and Girls.

If you go to Washington, DC or New York City, you can throw a stick and hit a hundred women’s rights or Black women’s organizations.  They hold brunches. They erect statues. They visit the White House. Get nice tickets to the BET Awards. They have budgets, executive directors and staffs. They hold themselves out as champions of Black women and girls and fundraise in our name.

So why then did it fall on a rag tag group of strangers  with no money, no budget, no organization other than a blog and a Facebook page to “educate” the editors of Ebony.com about the dangerous nature of their published views on the rape and sexual assault of Black girls?   And in the almost five years that the Genarlow Wilson mythology has been floating around the Black community, not a single one of these groups has said “Um hey. Wait. This isn’t someone we should be holding up as a hero or role model. He’s no longer in legal peril- let’s keep it moving.” 

You shouldn’t be surprised that now that this latest fight is over folks start coming out of crevices and cracks to offer up critiques. And you should absolutely not be surprised that these folks calling for the protection of the status quo at all costs are other Black women. 

If you are going to be an advocate for Black girls- whether that is on a blog, in a boardroom, in a classroom, in a church, on the street, in your own family, you had better expect that your most vocal opposition will come from OTHER BLACK WOMEN. 

Men may benefit from misogyny and sexism, but WOMEN are the primary enforcers. 


If you are lucky, these women will make their intentions clear. But more often than not, they will work in stealth, cloaked primarily by their gender and misplaced expectations of solidarity from other women.  Solidarity should be defined by shared values, not shared tastes in shoes.The only thing you know about another woman by looking at her is that she’s a woman. Whether  you embark on a journey to save yourself or rescue all of Black womanity, remember-gender is not shorthand for shared values and solidarity is not an excuse to be stupid. 

I was wrong in an earlier post when I posted the famous saying  “First they ignore you- then they mock you- then they fight you and then you win.” It should have been:

First they ignore you.

Then they mock you.

Then they fight you.

Then you win.

Then they whine

Then the bystanders start demanding you compromise and stop being disagreeable. 


Some people don’t like my methods... mainly because they do what I intended them to do - Get results!   The point was to shame and embarrass - they should be embarrassed! The point was to inflict enough discomfort to bring about a change in behavior. The point was to make their choice incredibly clear- you can choose to be an enemy of Black women or not.   The problem is not our lack of civility, but the presence of competence. We’re good at what we do! If we weren’t, you wouldn’t be whining. 

So if you don’t like a bunch of “incivility” between Black folks - I trust that the next time this blog audience identifies a threat to the health and safety of Black girls, you will be the first one picking up the phone to correct the situation over tea and crumpets. 

Because here at WAOD, we believe ---There is an US. There is a THEM. And that’s OKAY.

You can still have Black Unity. Be unified with other Black people who share YOUR values and be willing to go to war with Black people who don’t. Because trust me, they are at war with you whether you chose to acknowledge it or not. 


 One 11-year-old Girl vs 20 Men and Boys ... AND its HER Fault?- Cleveland, TX's SHAME!

22 y.o. Black Woman to 11 year-old Black Girl Gang Raped By 20 Men and boys: "That girl, knew What She Was Doing" (Completely Different Case from the First.)