Wednesday
Oct292008
René Syler: The Value of You
Wednesday, October 29, 2008 at 7:23AM The Blogmother 
The following is a guest post by René Syler, co-chair for Susan G. Komen for the Cure's Circle of Promise campaign. She wanted to reach out to What About Our Daughter to remind you that October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
By René Syler
Every Sunday night, the dawning of a new week, my daughter and I have a ritual we go through. It was one I did with my mother and she did with her mom before that. It's one that is played out in just about every African American household (more here). It is the hair thing! You know what I am talking about..the washing, pressing (my mom did for me) and braiding of the hair in preparation for the week ahead. As a black woman, speaking to other black women, I don't need to explain the importance of the hair ritual. We all know it and live it, even if we don't quite love it.But what's interesting to me about the hair ritual, is it give Casey and I a quiet time alone (between me telling her to sit still and stop pulling away from me) to talk about all manner of things.. school, boys (what little bit I can squeeze out of her) and heavy stuff, like breast cancer and why it is important to talk care of ourselves.
The strength of a community is built on the incredible resilience of its mothers, wives, sisters, aunts and grandmothers. They are seemingly invincible figures that we depend on for care and comfort. However, most of these women rarely spend as much time taking care of their own health.
There are two sides to this. If we want to ensure that our families are well cared for and healthy, we have to start by first taking care of ourselves. We make excuses about not having enough time or we tell ourselves that we'll always be healthy. The truth is, some illnesses are just random and it can happen to you. Take breast cancer for example.
Although I was not diagnosed with breast cancer there was an increased likelihood of a diagnosis. After numerous false alarms, a diagnosis of a pre-cancerous condition as well as my family history, I made a difficult decision to undergo a bilateral prophylactic mastectomy, the removal of both breasts, to help reduce my personal risk for the disease. Today, I am healthy and enjoying my family without fear or worry for my future and theirs. I was proactive with my health. The risks are what prompted me to take action. I love my life and those people in it. I want to be here, to watch my children grow up and graduate, to help heal their first heartache and to watch them bring home people I will generally find unacceptable (I hope not!). In short, the people in my life need me in THEIR lives. That is why I made a decision to put my health first - my life first.
Today, I'm a co-chair for Susan G. Komen for the Cure's Circle of Promise campaign, which was designed to help empower African Americans to make a promise to reclaim their health and become ambassadors in their communities. I've made a commitment to help other women understand the impact of breast cancer and offer my own experience in love, encouragement and sisterhood.
That's why October, which is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, is a good time to think about how we value ourselves - how we value our health. This is not something we can take for granted. Despite being less likely to be diagnosed with breast cancer, African Americans are twice as likely to die from the disease when compared to white women. So what can you do now?
Here are three things you can start today to make a difference in your life and the lives of others:
- Take care of yourself and practice breast self awareness. Tell your doctor about changes immediately. Early detection is the key to survival!
- Get involved with Komen Race for the Cure, Passionately Pink for the Cure®, the Breast Cancer 3-day, or I Vote for the Cure. Your support of these programs makes a world of difference in so many lives.
- Tell seven friends to join you in signing up with Circle of Promise and form your circles today!
As busy women we have to realize the importance of maintaining our health. We worry and stress about so many things. My book, Good Enough Mother, talks about doing your best and not worrying about being perfect all the time. But first, we need to understand taking care of our families means taking care of ourselves, those are intimately connected. You must take the time. You must know your family history. You can practice breast self awareness in the shower or lying down right before bedtime. You don't have to be an expert, but you must be familiar with your own body.
We all need to ensure that our personal commitments reach far and wide - that they help to strengthen African American women everywhere. Tell your girlfriends. Tell them to tell their girlfriends and sign up for Circle of Promise.
We can all do our part to rewrite the story on African Americans and breast cancer!
After all, if I am not here, who will do my daughter's hair? If you are gone, who will do YOUR daughter's hair?
Rene Syler first fought against breast cancer while supporting both her mother and father who are both breast cancer survivors. In 2007, after being a longtime volunteer with the Susan G. Komen for the Cure, she became a Komen for the Cure Ambassador, and Circle of Promise Co-Chair. In addition to being a wife, mother, business woman and tireless breast cancer activist, Syler is the author of "Good Enough Mother," published in March 2007. To learn more about Rene Syler, visit www.goodenoughmother.com.
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Reader Comments (16)
Thank you for sharing this story. I admit that I do have the habit of feeling my "ta-ta" but I haven't taught it to my daughter. That will change tonight.
Thank you so much for reminding us that we have to take careful,purposeful care of ourselves. As black women, we mostly consider taking care of ourselves as hair care. The sad thing is that if we have to endure breast cancer we will most certainly lose the one thing that means the most through chemo and other treatments.
My grandmother died of breast cancer, and I admit to being so negligent with my health as it relates to breast cancer. Thanks for the push in the right direction.
Check out the documentary "Healing Cancer." (If you are a member of Netflix, you can put it in your queue.):
"Filmmaker and researcher Mike Anderson questions the validity of conventional cancer treatments and offers a natural alternative for healing the body through nutrition and supplements in this comprehensive two-part documentary. Learn the common misconceptions about cancer as well as how to assess the benefits and risks of any cancer therapy. Researchers, nutrition experts and cancer survivors also offer inspiring testimony to natural healing."
Are Mammograms a Good Idea?
Safe Screening Methods do Exist: The Benefits of Thermography
Don't limit your knowledge to what you have been allowed to know:
http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2008/08/07/major-confusion-on-how-to-do-breast-checks.aspx?source=nl
Oh, one last thing: By the time that you have felt a lump in your breast, by the time that lump has been discovered, it is very likely that you have had cancer for about eight to ten years. That means that you have been living with cancer for eight to ten years. So, don't allow the medical professionals to scare you into having to make a quick decision to have your breast removed or subjecting yourself to chemotherapy, for you have been living with cancer for a long time by the time it is discovered. Therefore, you can take some time to get your head together to make a decision as to whether or not you want to have a body part removed and/or subject yourself to the poisoning that is chemotherapy.
Gina,
I think it is poor judgment to endorse the prophylactic removal of the breasts, or the unnecessary removal of the uterus, for that matter. There are proven ways PREVENTING breast cancer, even in those with the so called genetic predisposition. Here are some of them:
"The Simone Ten Point Plan:
NUTRITION. Maintain an ideal weight-lose even 5 or 7 pounds if needed. Follow a low-fat (about 20%), high-fiber (25 gm) diet. Take specific nutrients (see table 2). Eliminate salt, food additives and preservatives, and caffeine.
TOBACCO. Do not smoke, chew, snuff, or inhale other's smoke.
ALCOHOL. Avoid alcohol.
RADIATION. Avoid unnecessary X-rays and use sunscreens when in the sun. Avoid electromagnetic fields.
ENVIRONMENT. Keep air, water, and work place clean.
HORMONES/DRUGS. Avoid all estrogens and unnecessary drugs.
KNOW THE SEVEN WARNING SIGNS OF CANCER. Lump in breast, non-healing sore, change in wart/mole, change in bowel or bladder habits, persistent cough or hoarseness, indigestion or trouble swallowing, unusual bleeding.
EXERCISE.
STRESS MODIFICATION, SPIRITUALITY, AND SEXUALITY.
HAVE AN EXECUTIVE PHYSICAL ANNUALLY. "
You can find more information here:
http://www.drsimone.com/report.htm#nutrients
Barry
My aunt in law suffered from that ailment. it has been a fight.
Thank you for sharing that story
I'm sorry, some of you can't read. I didn't endorse anything. To be honest, I a shocked that this post is controversial at all. Clearly this is a matter near and dear to many of your hearts.
I was approached for Breast Cancer Awareness Month and agreed to participate.
Don't come up in here putting words and intentions into my mouth or things are going to get real ugly up in here REALLY FAST. I ain't trying to hurt anybody and for you to imply otherwise ticks me off.
If you want to do something PRODUCTIVE the you can submit a guest post in response.
I tell you NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED!
Of all the posts for people to act a fool. I never imagined it would be this one.
gem2001,
I do not know if you are refering to me when you say "some of you," but if my comments are in any way offensive to your post, please delete them.
with all due respect, I don't think "The truth is, some illnesses are just random"
Forgive me Gina, but cutting off two HEALTHY breasts, in order to prevent a a future illness very definitely is controversial! Cysts on the breasts, for example, are TREATABLE with diet and lifestyle changes. Historically, cutting off, or mutilating a woman's breasts has been used as a punishment!
@ Barry. Hey I don't have a problem with people offering alternative theories about a science issue. I am not a freaking breast cancer story. She wanted to share her story, I let her. Y'all have the ability to respond and you have.
But people coming on here imputing MY intentions about a post I did not write is irritating the hell out of me. I had no idea breast cancer was so dayum controversial now I know and there won't be anymore breast cancer posts for a LONG time.
I honestly thought this would be one of those posts people roll right past, but apparently I was wrong.
Disagree, I think medicine is part science and part art and part guess work. I don't have a problem with people offering alternative information or with openly and vehemently disagreeing with the person who wrote the post, but my NUMBER ONE PET PEEVE is people who try to tell me how to run MY blog.
I give you an opportunity to respond and I have issued an invitation to write a rebuttal post. I don't know what else I can do to soothe the rabid croud and if it wasnt' such and important issue I would just ignore all of you.
If there is contrary medical science then write a rebuttal post.
I remember when she shared her story on Oprah. It was touching.
Gina,
I appreciate you reminding African-American women of the importance of taking care of themselves and also reminding us that we are not exempt from breast cancer.
For any woman who has had the experience of finding a lump or having their physician find a lump (cancerous or not) i then waiting for the results of a biopsy is a hell-like vacuum that I would not wish on anyone.
A woman's decision to remove her breast is an emotional and deeply personal decision. There are some things that we CANNOT control and if I know that breast cancer runs amok in my family, I would take the necessary steps to insure that I would not have to suffer. We can modify our diet, lifestyle and even our genetic make up if our parents decide to custom-make us; However if we accept the genes that we have been given, only the Good Lord Above has the final say about our infirmities and afflictions.
I appreciate Rene being open enough to tell her story and make other African-American women aware that there other other options to treating and preventing breast cancer. Statistics don't lie that we are the group in the population with the worse morbidity and mortality rates for PREVENTABLE AND TREATABLE illnesses.
Instead of spending your time trying to shoot the messenger try spreading the message that "BLACK WOMEN NEED TO DO MONTHLY BREAST EXAMS!"
I LOVE this blog and this post, LOL . One thing that Barry fails to realize (it has been my experience that many people with such strong opinions on this are not fully informed) is that I did NOT have healthy breasts. I had already been diagnosed with Hyperplasia Atypia (the stage right before breast cancer) and had had four biopsies in four years. They were definitely NOT healthy breasts. I have a family who needs me in their lives and it ultimately is a PERSONAL decision. I wish people like Barry would show more compassion and less judgment. I also wish there was no breast cancer. I'll bet it will be a while before both things are a reality.
Thank you for posting such important information. My name is Stephanie Robin and I am fighting Stage IV Metastatic Breast Cancer and have been sharing my story through my organization, THINK PINK. Each day I am amazed at the number of people I meet who have never heard of the Breast Cancer Gene (BRCA). I am on a mission to spread the word and help as many men and women as possible. Had I known about the BRCA gene, the past five years of my life may not have consisted of many grueling chemotherapy treatments and painful surgeries, let alone the daily fear of my children losing their mommy long before I had a chance to raise them. My THINK PINK team and I have a lofty goal to collect ONE MILLION clicks by Dec. 31, 2009. I invite you and your readers to help me in my mission – a simple click is all it takes!!! Please visit www.thinkpinkrocks.com and click to be counted and acknowledge that you now have the information that could save your life. Please share this link with your friends and family. It’s too important not to. Thank you XOXO.