I could not leave on blogcation without commenting on this utter complete FOOLISHNESS from 100 Black Men of America and the Eagle Academy. Black Women, you better recognize that this will end in complete an UTTER destruction!
Saving Our Sons opens with “Raising Him Alone,” a panel discussion featuring prominent women who have successfully raised their internationally known celebrity sons alone.
Moderated by Meshelle, The Indie-Mom of Comedy (as seen on Nickelodeon’s Search for The Funniest Mom in America), participants on the panel are:
Dr. Mahalia A. Hines, mother of
rapper and actor Common,Dr. Brenda Greene, mother of
rapper and activist Talib KweliSheron Smith, mother of
Grammy nominated rapper and actor Mos Def
Until such time as public policy, the law, and the complete fabric of society is reordered to support a single adult family, this is complete and utter SUICIDE! Don’t be fooled by the hype. Don’t be blinded by celebrity. The only thing famous people are skilled to do is BE FAMOUS. They don’t have any special knowledge, skills or abilities. Just because your child is famous doesn’t mean you’ve been successful.
Young Black men don’t need to be taught that women can “successfully” raise children alone. HORRIBLE MESSAGE! The workshop should have been called “Picking a Man That Will Stick Around” or “How to Find a Man That Will Love His Children More than Life” or “How to Spot a Man That Take’s Fatherhood SERIOUSLY” or “How to Choose a Man That Will Climb Any Mountain To Protect His Children.”
Children are NOT Chia Pets! There is more to them than proper care and feeding. Resist the concubine conspiracy no matter how “well meaning” folks pushing the conspiracy appear to be. RESIST the conspiracy that it is normal or acceptable for Black women to shoulder the burdens and experience the joys of parenthood alone.
Harsh, but true.
That. Is. All. Now I can go on Blogcation.
PS. I am going to make a donation to the Eagle Academy Foundation. they do good work, I just disagree with them on this issue.
49 comments ↓
unless or until folk somehow get the nearly 5o% of black men an women who aren’t married married…then this conversation is moot.
Unless or until folk address the real reasons why folk aren’t marrying this conversation is moot.
Many women and men won’t forgo being parents for lack of a mate. Be it that they have their own or adopt.
So unless there is something new to say on this topic…this conversation is moot.
I agree that we must not “encourage” single parenting, however, I believe the advice of elders who have traveled the same road should not be discounted.
All of these women continued their education after becoming moms and some women are left as single mothers after the death of a spouse. There are a lot of reasons women are single mothers.
Also, I think Mos’s parents are together, I could be wrong on that.
On this one…I think your post has some assumptions…(hope you go on vacay before reading this, ROFL)
Is this a lecture for the kids or the mothers at the school? And Mos Def is a very political active MC, but his personal life with all those kids and marrying a stripper, I don’t think I would take that much advice from his mom on rearing a son
rapper, actor…sounds like they learned what in the streets and parlayed into the rap game
What about the engineers, attorneys, businessmen (non-rap game)
@jj , not. if it was moot, there wouldn’t be three comments about it. If it was moot, then there wouldn’t be a panel about it. You might not want to talk about it, but the argument is not moot.
@Sister P you know good an darned well widows do not comprise a substantial majority of the 82% of out of wedlock births in this country. If they were, the social security administration would maybe at least chip in enough for the baby to get some Pampers and Formula.
Again, this “€let not hurt the feelings” of single parents issue is a smoke screen to obfuscate and redirect. Instead of keeping the discussion on the kids, we change the discussion to the feelings and sensibilities of the parents. Notice this program isn’t about unmarried women, it is about women raising children ALONE. They chose the topic not I.
In regard to “discounting” advice, that ain’t what the panel is about. Its called RAISING HIM ALONE. Raising a child ALONE is inherently BAD. Whether the Daddy is around or not. It is BAD, yes, I’m not tolerating al this equivocating. Sorry, wrong blog. I SAID SENDING A MESSAGE THAT CHILDREN CAN BE RAISED BY AN ADULT BY THEMSELVES is WRONG, BAD, HORRIBLE, and NO GOOD.
When Mama is at work, its not okay for the kids to be ALONE.
If Mama’s in a car wreck, its not okay for kids to be ALONE.
If mama gets breast cancer, or heck, a really bad case of the flu, its not okay for the kids to be ALONE.
If mama gets laid off. Its not okay for the kids t be ALONE.
Families, no matter how you define them matter.
So sorry, it might hurt people’s feeling, but this is five kinds of wrong.
@naima oh thank you so MUCH for mentioning Mos Def’s “issues” who the heck declared these women to be successful mothers. their kids could be serial killers for all we know. If by “successful” you mean their sons aren’t dead or in prison, then you have low standards and need to raise them.
We haven’t even discussed what happens to these kids when they get older. Children need families. Some of you don’t want to admit that because this issue hits a little bit too close to home.
Hmmm…. Let’s See
Common, “conscious rapper” co-writer of a song with Kanye West that glorifies gangbanging women and engaging in douple penetration.
Talib Kweli – Promoter of some woman who wrote a book about loving her T.A.N (AKA Triflin’ Azz Nigga)
And Finally.
Mos Def – Wasn’t he the one who held his wif against her will when she made it clear that they weren’t a match after getting married only a week or so after he met her in some bar?
I can see this conference is gonna be AWESOME! Can’t wait to get the DVDs.
*SIGH*
I completely agree that telling folks anything other than “Children need families” is correct. I work to promote communication between absentee fathers and custodial mothers every day. But the world is not that black and white.
Husband leaves wife, who waited to have children until she was married and did what she was told was right. Your statement that “Raising a child alone is inherently bad” doesnt work in that scenario.
I attended “Raising Him Alone” and while the fact that your child is successful doesnt mean a darn thing – we all saw Kathryn Jackson earlier this week – those women were presented as being educated, successful mothers who successfully raised sons – not raised successful sons – and had wisdom to share. Did they have all the answers? No, and they said that. Did they agree with everything their sons had done and are doing? No, and they said that.
I’m with you on the family thing, but to tell a woman that she is “bad” for raising a child on her own is odd; what, exactly, for divorced/seperated/daddy went to jail women are the options?
Whatever workshop those mothers are doing is not a good idea for the black community as a whole. A community cannot be sustained with only single parents…no matter how much folks try to spin it.
In good circumstances, The ideal family should always be with two parents (hetero or same-sex). Nothing less.
@alexis and AGAIN, as is typical in any discussion regarding fatherless children you intentionally try to change the discussion by claiming demonization of mothers a tried and true tactic to shut the discussion down. Quote me where I said that the mothers were bad?? I SAID it is NOT a good thing to promote the idea that Family, however you define that, are optional. It is WRONG to send a message to young Black boys that their presence in their children’s lives are optional.
I said the message was a BAD one in light of the fact that SOCIETY is still structured for a two adult household. Otherwise children in single adult households wouldn’t be at such high risk for poverty.
So come on obfuscators and redirectors, keep trying to change the subject and make this once again about the parents and their sensibilities. My position stands, promoting the idea that fathers are optional is like promoting skydiving with a single parachute.
Its a BAD idea. Read for comprehension and take YOU out of the equation. It ain’t about Y’all.
When I saw Mos Def’s name I was thinking are we talking about the guy who has a boatload of children, children mothers and child support debt. Everytime I blink he’s in a new movie, working off that debt.
Lately, I have been hearing alot about this statistic out regarding single black women opting adoption; that bothers me, as well.
These “at least my son didn’t become a thug” single mothers and the black church are sending the brainwashed misled message.
I included the black church b/c everytime I hear a sermon(with the exception of Mother’s and Father’s Day) it seems like there is always an angle of praise for women rasing child(ren) as a single parent and anguish towards the men for walking out(not that I’m excusing it). What about how did we get to a statistic of 75% of black babies are born to unwed moms; this is not acceptable lets find some solutions to prevent or stop this deteriorating cycle of children being born to unwed mothers!!!!
….but then the pastor would lose a massive amount of income and membership.
Btw, Gina enjoy your blogcation. Bring us back something good. lol!!!!
Dang it! I was so gonna blog about this.
“I said the message was a BAD one in light of the fact that SOCIETY is still structured for a two adult household. Otherwise children in single adult households wouldn’t be at such high risk for poverty.”
I think Gina makes a very good point here. Stuff happens in life. My father died when I was 12 so my mom had to raise me by herself (this was in 1972). Gina isn’t saying those women are bad, she’s saying the idea of “It’s okay to choose to have a baby alone” in this climate isn’t a good idea. I work with women who have husbands and they’re struggling.
BTW, my mother’s mother died when my mom was 5 or 6 and she was raised by her mother’s family and by her father, in other words she was raised by more than two people.
Gina,
Enjoy your break!
I can’t even just believe this insanity… RAPPERS?
IA with your point Gina.
@GEM
I could have sworn you wrote a post about the ’round and ’round with BET is a bit pointless if there is no hardcore strategy in place.
My point is an remains that unless there is a strategy in place to deal with said issues – why go ’round and ’round about it.
Okay telling boys there presence isn’t needed when it comes to raising kids is wrong…
Now what?
Hence the moot remark.
Have I been officially banned?
Oh I see… you have a filter up… I ‘ll retype my comments without the profanity.
Gina, the hat’s killing me. Enjoy your vacay, you’ve earned it.
While a two parent home is most certainly the optimal course for a healthy family, life sometimes happens. Maybe I am way off, but I did not extract a message from the press release that championed raising young Black men in a single parent home by women. Rather, I thought it offered a perspective that single mothers can successfully a young man. Not saying that this is how a family should be raised, but if the unfortunate predicament presents itself; here is some perspective to give you hope that all is not lost.
“Hundreds of parents, grandparents, educators, mentors and concerned citizens will be on hand to learn strategies for helping Black and Latino young men achieve academic, professional, and social success at Saving Our Sons, a four-hour workshop/panel discussion seeking solutions on the educational crisis facing young men of color.”
From the press release, I take that they are trying to seek solutions. Now, while the panel may enjoy some sense of celebrity because they are mothers of hip hop stars; they are far from from Janice Combs (Puffy’s mom) or Frankie (Keisha Cole’s mom). I see that some have earned a doctorate, so I personally wouldn’t say that “they don’t have any special knowledge, skills or abilities.” I don’t know. I can’t dismiss someone unless I have heard what they have to say.
I come from a single parent home. Now, if I were to hold workshops for young black men in a similar situation; would that mean I am extolling the virtues of growing up with only a mother as a parent. I don’t think so. I’m just trying to help someone who may be sharing the same difficulties that I did growing up without a father. They are just sharing their experiences and why they believe they raised a “successful” son. Now success can be argued about what “success” means. That is fair. Lets just not dismiss this as foolishness until we see what type of results arise from the program.
Oh. Okay. In an earlier post, in response to someone’s comments you typed, “Its called RAISING HIM ALONE. Raising a child ALONE is inherently BAD. Whether the Daddy is around or not. It is BAD, yes, I’m not tolerating al this equivocating. Sorry, wrong blog.”
Obfuscation and redirection – not what I’ve done. I’ve responded to your comment. Did I claim demonization of women? No…….I pointed out that by stating that “Raising a child ALONE is inherently BAD” – your quote – you label a situation (that’s “raising a child alone”) as if the situation has chosen itself. Who is raising a child ALONE – forgive me for an assumption but it would have to be a parent, no?
So your statement has to be about the parents, correct, since they are doing the “raising”.
Not in disagreement with the concept that every child deserves 2 parents – pretty obvious to me, with myriad reasons, theories, and evidence to support that idea – but my point is and continues to be that telling a woman (or a man) who’s been left to raise a child along that “raising a child alone is BAD” addresses only a portion of the issue.
And while I’m sharing, I also don’t think that sisters need another workshop on “How to pick a man….” to do anything. If anything, a workshop on “How to Be About Your Life Until You are Chosen by a Man” might limit the number of women raising children alone.
Disagreeing with your comments in their entirety is not always obfuscation or redirection……..in my case, its simply outlining a gap in your strategy. That’s all.
Interesting blog – enjoy your vacation!
@alex again obfuscating and redirecting. the “it” I a referring to is “the title” of the seminar. I will repeat, a single-adult family is BAD. To imply women don’t need assistance and can raise a child alone is BAD WRONG BAD WRONG AND BAD.
Notice how @ am making what some ppl used to call judgement.
Unless you are a BEAR who has the ability to kill most threats to your cub, then you were not meant to raise children alone. Our society does not haves ufficient safety nets in place to run around cooing about raising kids al by your lonesome.
Period.
@Glen again obfuscation and redirection. Not buying the “life happens” argument. You know good darned well that the majority of single adult households ARE NOT the result of death.
Society is far more equipped to support a child whose Daddy dies than a child whose daddy just disappears. At least the child whose parent dies can get social security or a life insurance policy.
Where’s the life insurance for children whose parents just make bad decisions.
Stop trying to use an exception to define a rule.
Single adult householda are not ideal and SHOULD NOT be promoted. Kids need adults, more than one.
Raising a child by yourself is not the way to go IF you have a choice. I commend all women who are raising children without a father because of death, abandonment, domestic violence, etc.
I really question the wisdom of planning to raise a child by yourself when you have other options. Haven’t we seen how incredibly hard it is to do this well? Why promote this as a positive choice?
I understand the wish and desire to share life with a child is or can be a strong desire, making life without a child seem empty or “less than.” I hope more women will reject the idea they are not “real women” unless they have children, or they are missing out on the best part of life if they don’t have children.
Let’s try thinking about it from the child’s point of view. The child is the one who doesn’t have a choice in the matter and is the one who must live with the options imposed by the parent or parents. Most children want to know and be loved by two parents.
Children really need two parents. I think if two parents weren’t necessary to a child, two parents wouldn’t be necessary to create a child.
Yes, life happens. I am living proof of that. But if we’re talking about what we recommend, suggest, encourage, and promote, single parenting should not be included.
“Unless you are a BEAR who has the ability to kill most threats to your cub, then you were not meant to raise children alone.” –gem2001
That is the best single sentence argument against voluntary single parenting I have ever read! AMEN.
I agree with everything Gina had said.
When you’re a single adult with a child, you will realize quickly just how much an extra pair of hands can be God-send.
In the meantime…for already single parents, double efforts, no doubt, will have to be put in on raising successful sons especially black sons.
My first thought if I ran the panel would be on teaching black sons how not to perpetuate the cycle of early out-of-wedlock parenthood in the black community. This, I believe, is the most significant contributing factor to the disintegration of the black family.
Again, no one is stating that single parent homes are the optimal model to follow. I’m not sure what part of my statement you did not understand. Life happens is not an excuse or argument. Making bad choices are a part of life. Those that make bad decisions should not be treated like lepers and hung out to dry. Again, no one is saying society should promote single parent homes. However, solutions to the problem should cover an entire spectrum. I am not sure why you say I am misdirecting, as I have nothing to gain by obfuscating anything. I am not some undercover operative sent to undermine any cause. I go by no alias and my real name is at the top.
All I am saying is don’t dismiss a concept as foolish and we have yet to see the fruit of the program. Solutions to complex issues need more than one view. This is just one of them. One program can aim at promoting two parent homes, but another can offer an alternative if you find yourself in an unfortunate situation. I am far from an apologist, but it would be naive to think that these situations don’t occur. Again, I am from a single parent home. Not the best way to grow up, but my mother did her best. To promote single parent homes as the optimal model is lunacy anyway because by God’s law there should be marriage involved. But, like I stated before; I don’t think there is nothing wrong having programs that seek to educate and implement preventative measures in the future.
“You know good darned well that the majority of single adult households ARE NOT the result of death.
Society is far more equipped to support a child whose Daddy dies than a child whose daddy just disappears. At least the child whose parent dies can get social security or a life insurance policy.”
I’m not sure why you direct this at me because I never mentioned anything about the death of parent. I am not sure about being “far more equipped” because I am not well versed on the subject. However, you are assuming the age in which they can collect social security and that they have a life insurance policy at all. I don’t know the in and outs, so I can’t really comment. I know I keep repeating myself, but single parent homes IS NOT the best model to follow. But if you are in that situation, just know there is a possibility that you can still raise a successful son with the loving help of family, friends, and most importantly God.
@deborah the obfuscators and redirectionists don’t want us to bring up the perspective of the child because that would putting a child’s interest into the mix and this whole Raise Him Alone foolishness has Nothing to do with th child.
I hate driving around for 1 mile on a spare tire. Can you imagine going through life in FEAR that something might happen to your parent? I remember staying late after school. Plan A was to walk to my mothers job about a mle away. Plan B was to cal my daddy. Plan C was to call my maternal grandmother. Plan D was… ther was no dayum plan D. Once my grandmother was involved any number of able bodied adults would swing into action….. and that’s not including NON relatives, neighbors, church members and teachers and counselors.
I didn’t have a safety net, I had a freaking force field.
Took it for granted that I wold be looked after. I was NEVER alone. I used to be excited about getting to 6th grade so I could be a latchkey kid for a whopping 30 minutes until Mr Daddy came home. Even then the neighbors would put the CIA to shame with thir surveillance network.
But folks expect me to sit quietly by while folks basically promote the idea that children don’t DESERVE a plan B.NOT HAVING IT.
It wrong to teach young boys that they are optional in the lives of their children.
Nobody is calling for single mothers to be lepers again, you’re obfuscating in an attempt to shut down logical discourse with emotion.
It is illogical to “normalize” single adult households until such time as society is fundamentally altered to replace the two adult model.
So throw up smoke screens and booby traps. The point remains the same. SAVING OUR SONS… mean NOT Raising Him Alone. Its like the American Lung Society opening up a cigar bar.
I am not really understanding the argument. I am not sure who is saying children don’t have a Plan B. I don’t think that is the premise of the workshop. I don’t think the premise is to promote young men to grow up with a single mother. I don’t think anyone commenting is even saying that. However, say I am a black male in a single parent home and I am frustrated with my mother. Male and female tension arise and their is no father figure around. Well, this workshop can offer a different point of view from a mother is had to deal with certain struggles. Maybe, that young man can look at his mother differently because he hears something at the workshop that clicks. Maybe they can have a separate seminar with just men talking to the men. I don’t think anyone is saying NOT having is ever good, but don’t dismiss a woman who has earned a doctorate because she happens to be a single mother (or celebrity by some people’s standards). They just may have something to say that people can learn from.
Ok, this is going in circles. No matter how manner times I state that raising a son in a single is not optimal, that entire point is totally ignored. Like I stated before, I am just a normal guy who found this website because my wife mentioned it and I thought it was worth checking out. However, my difference of opinion earns me accusations of throwing up smoke screens and booby traps like I really desire to undermine our children. Actually, one day I hope to start a nonprofit and actually go back into the city (Detroit) and help young men who need help. Be better men for themselves and society in general. I started my own blog because of that. My continual theme is how to be a gentleman. Again, NO you should NOT TEACH how to raise a single parent home. Marriage is sacred and that is the optimal way a family unit should function. However, if someone finds themselves in an unfortunate situation; maybe…maybe workshops “may” shine some light from a different perspective.
Glen you are spending far too much time trying to get your opinion across instead of considering the premise of the post. In a very pushy, demanding “because you’re a man and we’re supposed to listen to you” sexist way. It is about standards and not normalizing dysfunctional behavior.
These women are offering a seminar which is an attempt at counterbalancing mass dysfunction. The out of wedlock birth rate just zoomed past 80%. It isn’t NORMAL for so many black women to be raising kids ALONE. The problem isn’t with the women it’s with the MEN ABANDONING THEM. There are always exceptions but this is about promoting “giving up” to a collective. Now do you understand? If you don’t then just be silent until it comes.
I thought I was quite clear. Truthfully, if you are going to call me sexist and demanding; you have to at least cite where I have been “sexist” and “demanding”. I have no clue where you got “I’m a man…you’re supposed to listen” from. In all my comments, I have been respectful and polite. I haven’t attacked anyone or anything. I state the optimal model for raising children is a two parent home where marriage is sacred. Yet, that is somehow ignored and I am sexist and demanding. I write on my own site that men should treat women with the respect they deserve. As well as themselves. No double talk. I only said that maybe…maybe something positive can arise out of the workshop. I read and re-read the press release concerning the matter and I did not see where it said, “We are teaching that abandoning our women/child is normal.” It is not normal. I can KEEP repeating that, but again that part gets ignored.
“It isn’t NORMAL for so many black women to be raising kids ALONE. The problem isn’t with the women it’s with the MEN ABANDONING THEM.”
I never said it was on the woman. I am not assigning blame to anyone. Rather, instead throwing unfounded accusations at each other; I only said maybe we should listen to all perspectives. I’ve been polite and courteous, but everyone is entitled to their own opinion and won’t begrudge anyone of that. I think that is all for me.
THAT’S why we have an 82 percent oow birth rate… the big MAYBE. MAYBE WE DON’T NEED A CONDOM. MAYBE the condom won’t break. MAYBE I can still get and keep a job after a child is born even though I didn’t have one before. The message to me is MAYBE your kids will be okay.
MAYBE this young girl is vulnerable because MAYBE her daddy thought he could MAYBE engage in activity that sends him away or MAYBE have relationships with multiple women at the same time. MAYBE no male figure in a woman’s life will pull out a shotgun and hold him acountable. MAYBE be can move out of state to pursue his dreams. MAYBE the kids will be okay.
MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE= RISKING A CHILD’S LIFE, RISKING A CHILD’S LIFE, RISKING A CHILD’S LIFE.
In the past, were we so willing to do that? Not as much. We certainly didn’t have PR Campaigns aimed at normalizing or promoting inherently risky behavior. RAISING A CHILD ALONE isn’t Called Raising a Child w/ extended family. The title says ALONE.
Alone means there is no plan B.
So “no”, I would no more drive my car without a seatbelt and hope that MAYBE I won’t die in a crash or get a tcket than I would consider promoting or remaning silent about a professional PR campaign to promote inherently risky child rearing.
Once again, unless you are a BEAR that can kill most threats to your cubs, you should not raise vulnerable dependent humans alone. Why is that such a hard concept to accept without qualification.
@JJ show me al the blog posts and news stories where we discuss normalizing single adult households as the norm?
THIS particular discussion RARELY takes place. If it did, people would not be equivocating. Large bodies of consensus have arisen surrounding BET . PPL either hate it or don’t. There hasn’t been any discussion based a nationwide PR campaign to start a Raising Him Alone Movement.
“FOOLISHNESS from 100 Black Men of America and the Eagle Academy”
“Me thinks” I may agree with Gina…just a thought. Wouldn’t it have been a great idea for the 100 Black MEN of America to focus on the value and importance of Men staying in families and raising children?
Maybe its their way of highlighting and finally recognizing the “new” father in many black communities…Mom. Perhaps this a new model. Maybe the old model was guy meets girl…marries girl…couple has baby. Perhaps the new model is more favored by many young black males. Guy meets girl…impregnates girls…leaves girl…finds different girl…impregnates…leaves…girl raises children.
Women end up being single raising children for many reasons. I think most do their best to get the job done well. But, I don’t know many who preferred the arrangement. I wish we could do more to encourage young families to stay together when we see them.
There are still many young black couples who marry. I don’t think our community will survive until we support this group as well.
Actually, in defense of 100 Black Men and the Eagle Academy, apparently they are just one stop on a tour of this Raise Him Alone campaign. Its a national campaign that’s spreading.
@Sister P you know good an darned well widows do not comprise a substantial majority of the 82% of out of wedlock births in this country.</i<
Where is the statistic from?
(shaking my head) There was a time when this argument would never take place. Single-parenthood is an inferior situation to married parenthood. FULL STOP. If you do not accept this fact then you are deluding yourself. For the record, Latino people DON’T have an issue with this. WE DO!!! It’s black women who were 31% married during the 2000 census and black men 42% married and 10% were married to non-black women. Those numbers are very low. A matter of fact they are the lowest in the country amongst all races. Over 56% of white men were married during the 2000 census, leaving Black men in the dust. The problem is simple, men who are not committed to marriage are even less likely to be committed to their out-of-wedlock children. This is why so many black women are “raising their sons alone.” Men must step up to the plate for their children and black women must stop having children with men who have not married the. Btw, only 10% of black single parents were widowed according to the 2000 Census
Btw, only 10% of black single parents were widowed according to the 2000 Census
True. And 30% were divorced. So 60% of black single parents have never been married. 70% of black children are born out of wedlock and there are studies indicating that this number may be slowly reducing.
The problem is simple, men who are not committed to marriage are even less likely to be committed to their out-of-wedlock children.
Actually, when income levels are even, black men are no less committed to their out-of-wedlock children than white men are. The problem is that a man of any race’s chance of being a part of his children’s lives is reduced substantially when he is not married to the mother and black men are not married to the mother’s of their children at a rate that more than double’s that of white men.
Thank you Beverly! The reason why you have an 82% oww birthrate is because we have not OBJECTIVE standards. People just get to make up whatever value system they want, irrespective of who it hurts.
I have first hand and close up experience with the single parent PLAGUE that ravages the Black community. I just left that site and did my best to “light them up” with a wickedly incisive and sarcastic comment that was nearly insulting. I don’t care. The ills of the Black community can be directly linked to broken family structures. In many ways, this nearly tacit endorsement of what essentially is a broken home defeats the purpose of the existence of organizations like 100 Black Men and The Eagle Academy. All they have done was to perpetute the existence of the very problems that require their existence. They have, in effect, taken 20 steps forward only to take 21 backwards.
The reason everybody else in the world is kicking our**es economically is because they understand the value of a household that consist of a mother and father, the problem is that many of these women cannot properly prepare their sons for a rites of passage!
Personally, I had strong black male relationships throughout my life…a strong black father, black male teachers, ministers, counselors, and the list goes on…I learned skills like how to tie a necktie, polish shoes to outdoor activities like camping, and hunting!
A lot of black boys raised in single parent homes don’t get these benefits, and in the worse scenarios…the prison-industrial complex becomes the rite of passage.
That Matriarchic Single Parent Bulls**t is another head fake that keeps us divided and White People in Power over us!
Great, we’re encouraging single mothers to emulate the mother of a ‘conscious rapper’ who raps about oral sodomy. Oh yeah, this is brilliant.
http://celiesrevenge.blogspot.com/2009/07/poke-her-face-un-conscious-hip-hop-oral.html
hmm, what strikes me is that 2 of the 3 panelist have phDs ( and another famous single mom – kanye’s mom earned one, too). I think the organizers of the panel meant well. but by focusing on women/single female parents who are apart of the top 3% of society (educated, advanced degrees) they kinda set up the audience – real life and online).
Parenting/family planning is also a socioeconomic issue. These women were able to cushion the blow of poverty-related statistics because of their education, professional networks, etc.
I think the organizers of the panel meant well. but by focusing on women/single female parents who are apart of the top 3% of society (educated, advanced degrees) they kinda set up the audience – real life and online).
EXCELLENT Point!!! Again, just like the whole Puff Daddy foolishness with 18 kids by 8 different women. People emulating the behavior and pathology of “successful” celebrities forget these people tend to have money.
What works for Puffy won’t work for a brother working 9 to 5.
The most dangerous communities for ALL Black women to live in are areas dominated by single mothers with unsocialized children.
Too many “Dunbar Villages.”
True to our collective insanity, we are now featuring panel discussions advocating family configurations shown to have been destructive on a mass-scale.
Thank you Gina, for the welcome sobriety on this issue.
Feminism did it. That’s what u all wanted. Liberation from the wicked oppressive patriarchy. Down with fatherhood and male leadership in the home. Reaping the whirlwind now. Keep griping.