WARNING to worker bees, the links to DaddyDontwantme.com will redirect you to a site called Sorry@$$babydaddies.com
… and now another edition of….. Parenting Tips From The Childless(PTFTC)…
Black women have a right to be angry, sad, depressed, happy, euphoric, indifferent, amused. Black women have the right to the full range of human emotions. They have a right to express those emotions and their pain. I am not anti expression, but I have to draw a line when you draw your children into your emotional catharsis. It is wrong to place the burdens of an adult on the shoulders of children.
A reader sent me an article about the work of DaddyDontWantMe.com. The email apparently thinks the site is a good thing and the title of the email was “Single Mom Gives Voice to Others” or something like that. It was Memorial Day weekend so I took a gander at DaddyDontWantMe.com which redirected me to a site called Sorry@$babydaddies.com. Now the site goes after men of all races, but of course WE are amply represented and the sites founder is an African American women.
Now I know all these new fangled Mamas are raising their children according to “Kim Porter’s Childrearing by Court Order,” but it is WRONG to involve your children in your very personal drama with their father. He may be a no count, shiftless, promiscuous, irresponsible, feckless, sluggard, but he is still THEIR FATHER. They will still love him, even if he is unworthy of that love and if I had a mother raging against my father like the women on this site, I would keep that love and affection for my father to myself if I was smart.
I am sure that the women on DaddyDontWantMe.com aka Sorry@$babydaddies.com have no problem letting their children believe that a morbidly obese White man in a red suit will climb down a chimney to leave Christmas presents under the tree, why not let them believe in the myth that their father is a decent human being for as long as possible. If they are saying this stuff about their children’s fathers online, you KNOW they are saying this around and to their children in real life. “But Gina! I don’t say bad things around my children!!” — I don’t believe you.
Here is a sampling of the posts under the “Suspected Deadbeat” tab on DaddyDontWantMe.com aka sorry@$babydaddies.com I am removing the names because we don’t know that any of these allegations are true and I question the mental health of anyone who would want to post this info on the internet.
[name removed] is the epitomy of a sorry ass baby daddy. He has eight other kids from different baby momas and out of all of the kids my baby lives in the same city and he doesn’t do anything for her. So sad! Not for my daughter though simply because I am a strong sista that has turned my life around meaning I am married to a wonderful man now that loves my children unconditionally, I am a success within itself meaning I don’t sit around and worry about what this black man does not do. Sorry@$$babydaddies.com
That is verbatim. Now my question is… what is worse than choosing to have a child by a man who is irresponsible and selfish? Choosing a man who you already KNEW was irresponsible and selfish. IT should have been no surprise that this man wasn’t going to be responsible for the life of your child if you already had substantial evidence to the contrary with the other 7. She says doesn’t have time to sit around an worry about this man, but she had time to post that on the internet. Here is another one:
[name removed] is 38, unemployed and living with his father and stepmom… what a loser! LADIES BEWARE! He will seem charming and smooth, but trust me it’s a trap! David is a sorry ass baby daddy because he wants a woman to take care of him and he wants to use her for her money, then when he thinks he has you, he will become violent and abusive.DaddyDontWantMe.com
Again, why would you have a child by a man who could not even take care of HIMSELF and is violent?? If he is a loser, what does that make you? “But Gina, I didn’t know”… well then you didn’t do due diligence. Who you choose to be the father of your children is the most important decision you will ever make in your life. And another one:
My child has some medical problems that come from his side, and four of his other children also have the same health problems. [name removed] if you are reading this get fixed so you won’t have 12 kids Instead of {7} and stop smoking weed, you can take that weed money and pay some child support.Well it’s now two years later and still nothing, He has about 9 kids now and still will not get fixed.DaddyDontWantMe.com
And another one:
[name removed] (29), currently resides in Cedar Rapids, IA. He currently has 4 children. He will not get a job because he obviously doesn’t want to pay child support. My daughter with him he has never seen and she is almost 1 years old. He also has never spent 1 cent on her and only claims her when it is condusive to him and his surroundings. He gets all these dumb ass white girls to put everything in their names so he can’t have any of his belongings taken from him for child support. He doesn’t have a drivers license either. He messes with multiple girls at once. He thinks he is going to become a rapper like most other black males. DaddyDontWantMe.com
Now that is just a sampling, you can read the rest on your own. The posts include photos, locations and full names and some SADLY even include photographs of the UNWANTED children. The primary complaint appears to be lack of financial support, but in what way does calling the man a sorry @$$ baby daddy increase the likelihood of them commencing financial support of their children? The thing about shame is that it only works on people who have the ability to be embarrassed. IF you got 8 kids with 8 different women, there is little this man is likely to be embarrassed about, otherwise he would have been embarrassed about not taking care of child #1
Now the site does have a section for “Real Dads”, but off the bat I had a WTH moment when I read the first entry of what is supposed to be positive:
Hi my name is[name removed] and i am a senior at University of California Santa Barbara. I’d just like to update my story since reciving the DNA test results, [name removed] has completely taken on his role as an active father going as far as putting our child on his medical insureance providing for our child the best that he can and just making and effort. Sorryassbabydaddies.com
I pasted that word for word. Now first, maybe I am old fashioned, but I can’t imagine telling the world that I had to establish my child’s parentage via DNA. Even if I did, I wouldn’t tell anybody. But to put our pictures up there too? Is this what we have come to? Are we supposed to be euphoric that a brother agreed to take a DNA test? That is a success story?
The site also included this fascinating documentary of Black 8th graders talking about what it means to grow up without their fathers. Fascinating, but a part of me cringes wondering if this should have happened in a non therapeutic setting.
SorryAssBabyDaddies.com
Then there is this video that I think is supposed to be a PSA about child support and the actress claims to have been successful at hiding her 15-year rage, but I am sorry, I don’t think you can hide that kind of thing from a child:
But Gina! THEY NEED TO KNOW THE TRUTH! Really? You think the kids won’t eventually figure this out. Whether you believe it or not, even when children know their parents are wrong, the kids still love them and children often feel responsible when the family is having difficulty, they wonder what their role is in the mess and typically take the blame on their own shoulders. The world will let your child know soon enough that their father is a sorry individual.
And to this labeling of your own child as “Unwanted” that is what probably ticked me off the most. Do you think your child does not know that they were unwanted? Really, if Daddy hasn’t shown up in years. Some of these children aren’t even out of diapers yet, and their own mothers not only view them as “unwanted,” but they have publicly labeled their children as such and put their pictures and video of the children up on the internet so the world can gawk at the children of two very selfish individuals. Trust me, if their own mothers think the kids are unwanted, I believe that they are sending that message to their children.
One day those kids are going to grow up and the world will tell them that they are wanted if only they will do X,Y,Z. IF you label your daughter as unwanted, don’t be surprised if she falls for the first boy wearing some TAG body spray who tells her that he wants her. If your child is unwanted, don’t be surprised if they turn to some mind altering substance so that they won’t feel the pain of being unwanted. If your child is unwanted they are likely not to value their own lives and thus might not value the lives of others.
Black women HEAL THYSELF! It is okay to be angry, but after 15 years you should have figured out a more productive outlet for that anger other than your Children’s father and you could have found a healthier tool to use in your healing process other than your own children. IF the child support laws aren’t working, then lobby for reform.
HOWEVER- GOVERNMENT WAS NEVER MEANT TO TAKE THE PLACE OF THE EXERCISE OF GOOD JUDGMENT BY INDIVIDUALS – When you rely on the government for anything, you will be disappointed so it isn’t shocking that when you rely on court orders to provide for your children, you are going to experience a less than optimal result. Government wasn’t intended to take the place of character or morality.
Please stop labeling your children as unwanted. Please stop having your children play any role in your quest for retribution against their fathers. It is not the children’s fault that they have two narcissistic, selfish people as parents. I know y’all haven been reading all those ESSENCE magazine articles featuring Kim Porter’s Childrearing by Court Order, and watching episodes of Maury Povich, but this is soooo not right on too many levels.
This concludes this edition of Parenting Tips from the Childless. What say you?
34 comments ↓
I saw that same site a few days ago and I was taken aback by the whole thing.
smh…
I say that this website should hire you as an advice columnist! This was an excellent post!
I actually heard about this site back in 2005. It was started by a single mother of four named Fadia Ward. I believe she is from the Philadelphia area and she started the site because her many different daddies for her four kids were not tryin’ to participate in their childrens’ lives.
It is indeed sad how these kids on the site are the meat in an idiot sandwich.
I have mixed feelings about the website. I do think that deadbeat dads should be called out, but at the same time I empathize with the children who are front and center of it all.
Once again, excellent post!
I agree with your advice wholeheartedly. I have met a lot of young women who are in the same boat as the women who have chosen to use daddydontwantme.com to vent their frustrations. But just like you, I imagine, I am amazed at how many young women make these same mistakes like they are going to be the one woman who makes a man who has more than one child by more than one woman be responsible and selfless.
In a nutshell, it all boils down to personal responsibility. Folks need to make better choices about who they chose to sleep with–especially if you are going the unprotected route–and be prepared for the consequences of bad decision making.
I want to aplaud all of you folks who are virgins, abstinent, or who have never had unprotected sex in your life. If you raised your hand, you a lie and the truth aint in you.
We all have slips of judgement which have momentous lifelong consequences. Dont believe me? Ask you momma and her momma and her momma and her momma.
The fact is, women been having kids out of wedlock for a mighty long time. I’m so glad that the community embraced and cared for these children instead of expending energy to reap mounds of scorn, blame and disdain on their single mommies.
I agree, single moms should never talk junk to their kids about their scrub baby daddy. I agree, dont have a babby by him. In other words, absolutely, personal responsibility is a must. Im questioning this chastising approach: its unproductive, callous, presumptuous — its republican.
There are married men who are fathers and do less than a stellar job of fulling their parental responsibilities. Dont believe me? Ask your daddy and his daddy and his daddy and his daddy…
This site would/could be a good idea if they made some serious changes. Like the names and faces of children should banned to protect them. They need an online therapist, spritual leader pastor or something. I’m all for venting, but these women need some sound advice. How can you have 4 kids with no good men? 1 or 2 I can understand but multiple babies by no good men?? that means you have the problem! Single moms need a place to vent, but leave the kiddies out of it.
I agree with everything that you have said and I shun all of the critism that has come to you b/c of it. The the comment made by “Stop” about the approach being “republican”, I guess that’s why alot of black folks don’t like republicans….b/c they require us to be responsible, productive, and accountable for our own actions. Anyway, the african american vote started out republican if you check your history facts. Don’t believe me? Ask President Lincoln. What you should focus on is “stop” making excuses for our race and face the facts that as a whole we unfortunately have a lot of growing up to do.
I’ve been called an “auntie tommy” by a friend of mine for me view on personal responsibility. When I say “folks”, I mean all of us. There is no doubt that we all do stupid crap in the name of lust, or the perception of love. However, we still have the duty to use good judgement. I would say there is absolutely no excuse for having multiple “no good baby daddies” unless you lack the good judgement to notice your approach is not working.
If that is Republican of me then someone get me an Elephant.
Stop, stop it. Cut it out. You sound insane. The point that completely went over your head was the impact upon the children. These women made mindless decisions (probably brought on by the very cycle they are repeating) and are passing it on to their children (the Genarlow’s and the Dunbar Village scumbags await them).
This is child abuse and the moronic imbeciles who post their stupidity on the net are the abusers. They are also idiots. On some level, most folks know that the guy with the du-rag, gold teef, saggy and baggy jeans, and neatly folded bandana WILL NOT make a good father (or husband).
This isn’t about abstinence, its about common sense. If these folks can go on the internet and post their miserable failures, they can easily go to the local convenience store and buy a case of condoms. They can even go to the old school pharmacy and investigate a morning after pill (I think its called “bitter apple”). Hell, as a last resort, they can even take the advice of Jocelyn Elders and T-Boz and… er, go visit the island by themselves.
Stop, stop excusing stupidity.
lorea and jonzee–
I concur. Great comments! Why does it seem that touting personal responsibility in the black community is synonomous with ’selling out’ and ‘acting white’?
Common sense and personal responsibility transcends political affiliation.
Having one child due to irresponsible decisions is understandable, but four and five??? Before the age of 30? With no father in sight?
We can do so much better!
Some women who are the 4 or 5 baby momma actually think their situation is going to be different. It is that same woman who is dumb and immature enough to make that decision, is the same one who supposedly is so happily married would take time of their “happy” day to put their kids father on blast.
I had no idea that there was a site of such nature! My main concern of course is the children. I know it is tough for single mothers and fathers out there that are struggling to raise children on their own. Although I do not have any children, I can only imagine that it is not easy doing it all on your own. But I agree with the author of this post in many respects. Why should we subject our children to the idea that their absent parent doesn’t want anything to do with them? We should spend more time encouraging our children and helping them to see that they are beautiful and have a lot to live and strive for, even if one parent isn’t involved in their lives. I know there is frustration at the situation, but I think it is better for the child if the parents keep negative judgements about the other parent away from the child- it only hurts them in the long run. I am not saying that I have all the right answers for single parents, I am only saying that we have to think about the feelings of the children first.
Look it’s not the ideal situation to have a child without full participation of both parents, but women do it. People make mistakes, but it is equally important to seriously analyze one’s choices and motivations. It just isn’t smart to not use birth control and proper infection protection, spend some time getting to know that person before bedding them and really choosing partners more carefully. I realize due to youth, state of the heart/mind/soul and other factors we don’t always make the best choices BUT ignoring OBVIOUS RED FLAGS with people and being willing to SETTLE for crumbs will not yield favorable results. My sister got pregnant at 15 and it was for fairly typical reasons: lack of sex education, denial, dating an older boy, my mother not paying attention. By the time I found out and was ready to drag her to Planned Parenthood despite her insistence to not needing it she was already ‘knocked-up’. As challenging as it was one thing she did not do was have any more children. She’s 31 now and despite numerous conversations with ‘friends’ of hers who have gone on to have 2, 3 or 4 children with varying numbers of fathers she said she learned her lesson and would not have any more. At some point despite all situations to the contrary [low self-esteem, etc] an individual has to decide from herself what she wants her life to be and what price she is willing to pay to be the victim.
At some level I feel for these women. I cannot imagine how difficult it is to raise a child as a single parent. That said if you love your children even a little bit, it is in their best interest to uphold an image of their father as a good man. They will grow to know the truth about him so enough. What they will remember is that you loved them enough to let them form their own opinion.
@Al, Lorea, Jonzee et al.
As stated in my previous post, “I agree, single moms should never talk junk to their kids about their scrub baby daddy. I agree, dont have a babby by him. In other words, absolutely, personal responsibility is a must.”
What Im in disagreement about is the approach (reproach) that is often used to address problems concerning black women and single parenthood. I’m completely aware of the harm done to the children. But the only person that’s in a position to help the children is the mother of the children.
Giving someone a lecture about how messed up they are in the head is not how you reach a person. I appreciate the work that Gina does but if I disagree with her then that’s okay. I’m sure she respects that.
The Republican party back in the day is not the same party it is today so you really cant equate the two. Even us ignorant folk know that. Its quite twisted and foolish to think that accountablilty and moral values (and I STRONGLY encourage both) is synonomous with the Republican/conservative values. I do not equate “Republicanness” with whiteness. I equate it with being unsympathetic and being limited in your ability to empathize with someone who is not mentally, emotionally, financially, educationally, accomplished according to one’s standard.
We need to recognize that black women don’t have 4 or 5 kids simply because theyre triflin promiscuous, stupid, dont know no better, etc. Something else is going on.
Unfortunately, bad dads come in all shapes and sizes, even in a nice tailored suit. If we’re going to reach these “wayward” women then try reaching out in love.
A child is half their mother and half their father. If the mother talks negatively about a childs’ father to them, that child will have deep emotional problems in adulthood, unless those emotions are resolved through therapy. My mother told me to never sleep with a man that I didn’t want to have a baby with, and that baby tied us together for life.
I actually thought I was rather gentile today… Oh well, no good deed goes unpunished. Actually I am shocked I only had one person chime in to defend the women on the site. I actually thought the majority of the comments would be negative because anyone who talks about personal responsibility gets told that they are “pulling a Cosby” these days.
It is nice to know I am not the only one who found this site troubling.
This was not an indictment of single mothers. This was an indictment of women who have bad parenting skills. There are plenty of Black women who raise their children alone without having to resort to sorrybabydaddies.com.
If I wanted to go on an anti fornication rant or listed the litany of birth control options available, I think THAT would have been judgmental. I think anything other than condoning everyone’s individual choices no matter how counterproductive and harmful is viewed as picking on people.
I agree, sometimes you catch more bees with honey, but that wasn’t the point of the post. The point of the post was for me to cry foolishness after a reader sent this to me packaged as some type of Black women’s empowerment site.
Parenting Tips From the Childless isn’t really meant to transform lives, but to provide a criticism of bad parenting from someone without children. I came up with the name after I called foolishness on a mother who climbed onto a school bus and demanded that her daughter beat up the bus bully while the Mom stood there and watched. Attorneymom said that she loved it when childless people start giving parenting advice and thus the PTFTC was born. I seriously doubt that any of the women on the site will be seeking fine counsel from WAOD.
I have very little tolerance for people who abuse or neglect their children, that what this site is to me, but I get stop’s point as well.
Now lets all get in a circle and sing.
i think it’s bizarre how people feel so comfortable sharing private information about themselves and their children over the internet? I feel the same way when i see parent’s put their kids on reality shows (celebrity parents included). There used to be a time when you tried to keep people out of your business, know people invite you right in.
Greetings!
Thank you for this post!
It is absolutely inappropriate for a mother to put her children’s father on the internet with disrespectful commentary…
What if a man puts on the internet details that she would be embarrassed and humiliated by? Some prospective employers DO search the internet and some will even read blogs and MySpace pages in order to determine what a candidate is REALLY like.
We have to understand that when we start being petty, IT WILL come back. It will, it will.
There are avenues that these moms can access if the REAL ISSUE is receiving child support. Often, the real motive is retaliation.
I just hope that these moms find another outlet for their anger that is going to produce better outcomes for their lives because Dr. Angelou wrote, “bitterness feeds upon the host”.
Peace, blessings and DUNAMIS!
Lisa
I read the original post about this site.
It really is not more than a venting forum in my opinion.
I am a grandmother now, and I have parented as a single woman, a married woman and a divorced woman. So I know a little somethin’ about this particular subject.
Don’t hate what you helped to create.
Birth Control~it really has a purpose in a society where women want to be sexually free. The name pretty much describes the outcome. And I do not believe that is the sole responsibility of females. But if you opt to have sex without using any type of preventive measures it is like saying, it is okay for you to impregnate me. And if you are not a responsible individual, I will assume all the responsibility for our child’s care.
If he has a reputation of being a babbydaddy to many, do you really want to be on that list? It is a question that needs to be answered before sex. Afterwards may be way too late.
Think about your children!
I have some friends who are fathered by different fathers~they play the dozens and talk about each other’s fathers like they are on Comic Relief. But there is a lot of pain infused in their laughter and jokes. Their mom laughs right along with them. ?????
People seem to forget that the internet is a wide open forum. Opinions are going to be formed and given. So the statement about not doing so is moot.
I urge all sexually active females and males to consider what your lusty desires can produce. If you do not like the person well enough to be supportive of any children you produce~either abstain or use birth control. And if you have already made a child with someone that isn’t carrying their end of the responsibility~get some legal assistance and handle your business!
While I totally disagree with this website and the women’s use of it I also disagree with some of your statements. I think it doesn’t do anybody any good to generalize based on what you think someone’s situation is. I think it’s not fair to denigrate a woman who has a child by a man who has multiple children with other women. Without knowing the details of the situation you are making a blanket judgement. What if this man lied to her and told her he didn’t have any other children? Then she would have had no reason to believe that he wouldn’t take care of the one he has with her. And everyone at some time or another makes bad decisions. Yourself included. If you or anybody else says they haven’t they are lying. The difference is some of us choose to cover up those bad decisions by aborting pregnancies or just by the grace of God their one time lapse of judgement didn’t result in a pregnancy. Still you are no better than the women who were in love, and duped by these men. You’re just lucky. And it’s always easy for someone on the outside looking in to pass a judgement without knowing all the details. But at the same time, I fault these women for airing their dirty laundry because they put themselves in a positon go be judged. Just some food for thought…
No Cami, people aren’t just lucky! There are actual responsible women out here who haven’t had abortions, who’ve never had a pregnancy scare and who have made good choices in their lives to protect themselves and any future children they might have.
I have never been pregnant and it’s not because I was “lucky.” It’s because I thought about the consequences of sex BEFORE I chose to have it (or not have it) and made sure that I picked a partner that I knew well and trusted AND then chose to protect myself.
I am tired of women who have made “mistakes” trying to lump everyone in the same boat because THEY personally feel judged and they’re trying to bring everyone down with them.
The point is that we all have choices. Some of us do in fact make good ones and our situations had nothing to do with “luck,” but GOOD CHOICES.
As a mother I know it can be easy to say mean, hurtful things about the father of your children. It’s been said here before, the priority is the well being of the children. It’s not easy to take the ‘road less traveled’, and keep your hurtful, spiteful comments to yourself or to anyone other than your children. I raised 3 grown daughters and I’m still raising a 15 year old and a 10 year old, both girls. I was married to their father for over 20 years…he didn’t start to disown them, and refuse to care for them until after I divorced him. Now he acts like any other dead beat Dad. I haven’t always been able to do this, but I am now able to advise my daughters to not sleep with anyone they don’t won’t to make a baby with. And if they make that decision, then they should be ready to face the consequences, even if it is alone.
But few sexual contact/acts just happen in so many cases the participants make the wrong decisions.
Wow, I am shock to find out that there is a site out there like this. I never heard of it before, but I will check it out for curosity.
I don’t care to visit the site. I also get puzzled as to why some women (especially older seasoned educated women who you think should know better) get themselves involved with these type men, knowing very well many of these men already have repulsive paternal histories. Red flags flying all over the place. But everyone wants to think somehow their special or exempt from the wrath.
I don’t believe in wrongfully berating fathers in front of the children to a certain degree, or when the kids are toddler. At the same token, I don’t believe in putting on a fairy tale to shield these men from their willful transgressions towards their own children. No man should get a free good character ride on a already overwhelmed mother’s expense. It’s like a double edge sword.
We seem to have a revolving crisis in our community. The key is to let children know the behavior of their father does not reflect them as children or individuals. Therefore, nothing is wrong with being upfront with these kids at least when they reach tween age. Children don’t need to be tricked into thinking daddy and his behavior is like prince charming when he’s not acting like one. I don’t believe in putting on a front or playing footsy for these men. Little girls and boys need to know these behaviors are unacceptable to accept or dish out. This is why we will always have a vicious deadbeat/multiple baby daddy/multiple baby mama cycle jabbing us in our communities.
Some of these men don’t even think highly of their own children. If they did, they would also care what is being said to their children about them, and do better.
I don’t pretend to have all of the answers, but I have seen women who allowed their children to romanticize a horrible, absent father, and they ALSO paid a hefty price for it.
Mommy becomes the ‘bad guy’, who was so mean & unloveable that Prince Daddy left them all… then any attempt to discipline the child is seen in a skewed context.
I have also seen young people almost lose their sanity when absent Daddy shows up at college graduation and the fantasy they have been nurturing for 21 years gets blown sky high.
I definitely do not think that venting to the child is healthy. I also oppose posting pictures/videos of your kids online.
Perhaps some kind of age-appropriate balance of telling the truth (not every little detail, but the truth nonetheless) in therapy sessions might help.
I talked to this young woman back when she first started the site. Frankly I don’t really care if they choose to ream these men out from one end to another. But as I told her, leave the children out of it. Of course, she paid me no attention (Obviously), but the damage is irreversible.
The parent that is present in a child’s life will always be ‘the bad guy.’ Why? Because they’re there. It’s safe to vent at them because the child knows they won’t leave them. There is no need to lie to a child about the other parent. They will figure out on their own what they are. I know it’s hard, but it’s absolutely crucial. If you badmouth their parent, you’re badmouthing your child, and they’ll never forget it.
WHen I found this site, I thought to myself “it must be a joke..it has to be a joke…” but it isn’t. I mean I read the founder’s bio and I am like wth? you can’t be serious….
but alas, it is…
My mother raised the four of us by herself. YOu know what? As bad as my father was/is, she NEVER bad mouthed him. My mother has always encouraged us to maintain a relationship with him and to treat him with respect. My mother had every right to bad mouth but to this day, she has never said one bad word about him to anyone.
I can tell you all kinds of crazy things about my dad but that would take away from the good my mother has done for us.
If anything, my dad has taught me what I am NOT supposed to do as a father.
Thanks pops…
this is so sad and pathetic, but more than that – it’s called child abuse – mental & emotional.
i grew up in a household where my mother cursed and talked about my responsible father on a daily basis.
it was horrid and often unbearable, never a kind word about the hardworking self made man, who owned his own businesses/corporation.
my grandmother used her mouth to curse him and talk about him like he was lesser than an animal.
they used words i can’t repeat and he’s dead now – my mother still cussing him – violently.
i’m divorced for years, my 30 yr old son tells everyone i’ve never seen my parents argue and i’ve never heard my mother say an ill word about my father, who she didnt always agree with.
i’d rather die and go to hell first before i put that emotional heartache and dysfunction into my child’s life.
the women themselves need parenting classes, counseling and therapy.
Have A Flawless Day,
The majority of you are fools….
If this is child abuse what do you call what the fathers are doing?
How many of you women had abortions?
How many of you men paid for abortions? Thats child abuse don’t you think.
What gets me is that people still to this day are so very ignorant, judging these women like you don’t have flaws in your life. But as I have stated before as long as you guys stay in that kitchen nigger mantility we as a people will never evolve. But go ahead and keep finding the women as being wrong, I know we should have never planted the seed of conception into our eggs oh yeah wait women don’t produce nut {Do They?}
@shelto9912
I never said anything to lead anybody to believe that I was lumping every woman into any category. And for you to point out that there are some responsible women out there is an insult to my intelligence. I know this, I never said that all women fall into either this group or that. But it is a FACT that there are some who are, I know some personally. My whole point of commenting was to say that nobody should be put in a box and generalized in one way or other. Maybe you should re-read what I wrote. And I am not defending the mistakes that were and are made, simply pointing out that nobody is without mistakes. Do you walk on water? If you say you have never in your life made a bad choice you are lying plain and simple. Now whether your bad choice pertains to your choice in men is irrelevant. What I am trying to point out is let he who is without sin cast the first stone. Don’t be judgemental plain and simple.
Why would these women want to have children with these losers – makes them losers too and brings innocent children into the world. What’s wrong with birth control? One child I can see, but multiple children, most with different fathers? What’s wrong with you?
i fully understand what this man is talking about but don’t think just because we write on there means that we go home and tell our children about their fathers as well.everybody needs a place they can go and vent for awhile and being that these particular fathers share one thing in common and that’s not taking a direct role in their children’s life it has now become a place where wpmen can go and express themselves and have some type of support.Don’t belittle the site just because you are not in this situation.
Please stay tuned to MillionsForMoms.com
It a site that is focused on the issue of deadbeat dads and the financial impact it has on the lifestyle of the children. Millionsformoms.com will raise money and distribute it to single moms through a non-profit organization to assist with educational and medical needs of these children. Mothers will also be able to post photos of deadbeat dads in an effort to flush them out and accept responsiblity for their children.
An excellent book for all to read about fatherlessness and forgiveness.